He Aint No Micheal Jordan

By Eric D.Graham
Updated: June 22, 2011

The King and I

The King and I

NORTH CAROLINA—(BASN)”He is 26, looks 35, and acts 16″-Skip Bayless

There is a storm of controversy brewing in the world of sports. It involves the Miami Heat’s Lebron James’ after the game comments that occurred following the Heat’s loss to the Dallas Mavericks in six games.

James said that his critics and haters despite being happy that he failed would still ” have to wake up tomorrow and have the same life that they had before they woke up today”

As true as these words were, many Caucasians felt his comments were elitist and condescending. As a result, many of them were outraged by King James’ attitude.

Here is satirical article written by a 56 year old Caucasian woman from Columbia, South Carolina in response to King James’ press conference elitism.(please read it with your best Southern accent)

Lebron James sure isn’t no Michael Jordan.

Michael Jordan was so polished and polite. Michael was such a perfect gentlemen. He was the perfect (cor-pit) pitchman. He was a UNC graduate. A Dean Smith Discipline. And a real winner.

And for all of these reasons and many more, Lebron could never walk in Michael’s shoes.

Why? Because he is just a loser.

Besides, Michael would never speak to us the way the “so-called” King does.

The so-called King is so arrogant. He had some nerve to brag about his riches and throw his money in our faces.

Who does he think he is…..Jesus?

I get the feeling that he thinks he is better than us because he can play basketball?

Well, I dare him be so snobbish right in front of our faces.

He can’t talk to us like that? Doesn’t he know his place in the world?

My husband told me that the reason he acts like that is because he didn’t go to college and didn’t get properly trained on how to act, how to behave, how to talk, and how to answer questions without offending us.

He probably can’t even read, anyway? He only has a high school diploma, you know? Plus, he fired his agent. And gets all of his advice from his posse of uneducated friends.

Who is the Maverick Carter fella, anyway?

That’s another topic for another day.

Besides, that Lebron James just makes me so sick.

Didn’t you see how he treated Dan Gilbert in Cleveland? That was totally unacceptable.

What kind of message is he sending our children?

That’s why he will never be a role model for any child of mine. I, in fact, don’t even allow anything with his face on it in my house. I hate to see his face on television and especially on those Farm Bureau commercials. He simply disgusts me.

Besides, all of these new school Black athletes are so full of themselves.

I wish they would just play ball and keep their mouths closed.

And one more thing, Michael Jordan would never shamefully walk around wearing a President Obama tee-shirt. Because Michael knows that Republicans wear Nike tennis shoes too. Just ask Harvey Grant?