CAROLINA CRISIS: THIS IS BIGGER THAN YOU By Michael...
HERE COMES THE HATER VOL.124
NORTH CAROLINA (BASN)—1. Have you seen little Wayne’s bloody new video?
Yes, I have seen Little Wayne’s bloody new video and it’s a master piece.
2. Do you like the Miami Heat’s GM Pat Riley?
Yes, I like Pat Riley but he looks like an old school vampire.
3. Is the phrase “Sticks and stones will break your bones but words will never hurt you” still true?
No. Why? Because, words do hurt. Just ask President Obama?
4. Did you see the NC State versus Georgetown game?
Nope, I was in my bathroom, sitting on my toilet, reading some of my uncle’s old jet magazines.
5. Did you see the HBO inspired Game Changer movie about Sarah Palin?
Yes, I saw it and President Obama killed her acting career as well as her political career.
6. What does the IFL stand for?
In Terrell Owens case, it stands for I’m an “F-IN” Loser.
7. Has the rise in gas prices affected your spending habit?
Yes, I am currently surviving off of Ramon Noodles and cinnamon flavored Pop Tarts.
8. Do you like Kentucky’s John Calipari?
No, because everywhere he goes trouble seems to follow him.
9.Does RG3 need to throw during the NFL Combine?
No, he doesn’t. Did you see this dude run? That’s enough for me.
10. Did the NY Giants need to release RB Brandon Jacobs?
Yes. Why? Because the tip-toe burglar is not better than Ahmad Bradshaw.