Imitation And Life, Volume XVI

By Michael - Louis Ingram
Updated: December 11, 2011

(Editor’s Note: This article was originally published by BASN on December 15th 2011)


PHILADELPHIA (BASN):Now I’m no doubt dating myself here, but some of you way Back in the Day remember when you went to a movie theater and you got the newsreel (no, I’m not that damn old!) features…and a cartoon?


I was old enough to remember the cartoons (especially Woody Woodpecker looking liked he had escaped from the asylum and that lame – ass Mickey Mouse); and of course we all know (or should by now know) cartoons were never designed for kiddies.


So, with that in mind, I ask that you…


“Be magnanimous – you might be a fiend yourself someday!”


(Daffy Duck to the judge and mustachioed jury while on trial for mayhem and being a wise quacking duck in the 1946 Warner Brothers classic cartoon, ‘Daffy Doodles’ – the first produced for Mr. Duck by the great Robert McKimson).


A Nightmare on Front Street, Part II


The evil manifested by the collusive effort to suppress a crime of epic proportion at Penn State produced another blip on the pervert radar – at Syracuse University.


Bernie Fine, assistant men’s basketball coach and head coach Jim Boeheim’s right hand man for over 35 years, was accused of sexual molestation by two ball boys. According to accounts, Bobby Davis, who was a ball boy for some Syracuse teams, was sexually molested by Fine and told Syracuse police as far back as 2002; although attempts to follow up on said claims were buried by local law enforcement.


Despite facts about others who may have also been abused by Fine, Boeheim went out of his way to rip into Davis and other accusers, calling them liars and fervently defending the man he said he knew well…


Until a telephone call between Davis and Bernie Fine’s wife, Laurie, dropped dime on some skewed realities. Davis recorded a conversation where Mrs. Fine admitted that “it’s all about the dick” with regard to her husband’s twisted desires. Mrs. Fine also revealed that her husband believed he was above the law in this excerpt from said conversation:


When he gave you the money, what does he want for that? He wants you to grab him or he wanted to do you?” she asked.

“He wanted to do me. He wanted me to touch him, too. He tried to make me touch him a couple of times. He’d grab my hand, and then I’d pull away, and then he’d put me in your bed, and then you know, put me down, and I’d try to go away, and he’d put his arm on top of my chest. He goes, ‘If you want this money, you’ll stay right here,’ “Davis said.

“Right – right” Laurie Fine said. “He just has a nasty attitude, because he didn’t get his money, nor did he get what he wanted. He didn’t get…”

Davis interrupted her at that point and said, “It’s not about the money.”

To which Laurie Fine replied, “It’s about the dick. I know that. So you’re — I’m just telling you for your own good, you’re better off just staying away from him.”


As Boeheim was attempting to take his foot back out of his mouth upon the inclusion of this new information, Laurie Fine had added her own peck’o dildos, er…make that peccadillo – into the discussion:


(There’s always been something wrong; always, just as long as I can remember. But I never knew what it was until all this happened.)

{Stop it Martha! Stop this crazy talk!}

(You’re afraid of hearing it, but I’m more afraid that you…)

{I won’t listen to you!}

(No – you’ve got to know. I’ve got to tell you. I can’t keep it to myself any longer. I’m guilty!)


(Dialogue between Audrey Hepburn and Shirley MacLaine in “The Children’s Hour.”)


Turns out Laurie Fine is guilty – of putting out liberal amounts of Dat Meow Mix to Syracuse basketball players on an annual basis; one media site also alleging that a sex tape exists with Fine and an Orangeman. It should also be noted Fine had her own affair with Davis (which no doubt afforded the climate for that entre nous phone call).


So now Boeheim suggests he now knows nothing about the man he lives across the street from (Fine) who he has interacted with for over 35 years; and by the way, Boeheim, Fine and Syracuse hasn’t apologized to the victims any more than Sandusky did.


To add insult to injury, after Boeheim, who should have been fired for the sheer arrogance of his previous statements alone (and that all of this was happening on his watch) the Onondaga County prosecutor (some chump named Fitzpatrick) talks out of both sides of his mouth about how they would really like to do something for Davis and others who came forward, but aw shucks, the statute of limitations has passed. If only we could’ve done something sooner; and by the way, stop calling to have Boeheim fired:


(“I’ve always wondered, what’s the devil look like?”)

{Well, there are all manner of lesser imps and demons, Pete, but the great Satan hisself is red and scaly with a bifurcated tail, and he carries a hay fork.}


((“Oh, no – no, sir; he’s white, as white as you folks, with empty eyes and a big hollow voice. He likes to travel around with a mean old hound. That’s right.””))

Dialogue between John Turturro, George Clooney and Chris Thomas King in “O Brother, Where Art Thou?


Lost in the lack of reporting is the collateral damage done by the prosecutor and everyone connected with the university: where can these young men go for redress of a horrible situation?


(“You must go…to the Rats!”)

{“But I don’t know any Rats…”}


Dialogue between John Carradine and Elizabeth Hartman in “The Secret of NIMH.”


Fortunately, I do know a few rats, Liz – they mostly reside in Florida but some of them have holed up in Connecticut; and the fact ESPN was in bed with Syracuse is a large reason why Davis got screwed – and why The Mouse isn’t charged as an accessory in this crime by withholding information.


It should also be noted that many Mouse alums are Syracuse graduates – and broadcasters and play – by – play announcers like Marv “Perverted Panties” Albert, Ian Eagle, Mike “Morocco Mole” Tirico, Bob Costas, Dave O’Brien and others would seem to not go out of their way to get to the heart of the matter, given the egregious manner in which the story was buried.


The pattern was already established by the guttersnipes at Penn State, who hope, in spite of a second arrest of Sandusky (and subsequent successful bailout) have urged their charges to maintain the status quo.


I obtained a letter from the President of Penn State which spells out their methodology in the near future:


A Message from President Rodney Erickson: Moving Forward Nov. 21, 2011 In the last two painful weeks, Penn State has been shaken to our foundation. But we are moving forward, and with every decision we’re committed to doing the right thing for the victims, their families, and the Penn State community.

You have all played a role in helping us define a path for the future. You have inspired us with your resilience, generosity, and hope. You have given me your confidence and encouragement.

In the spirit of giving thanks, I wish to share a few observations about our community.

1) We need to continue to listen to one another. I’ve been contacted by countless students, faculty, staff, alumni and friends, and I’ve tried tovisit as many classrooms, organizations and campus gatherings as possible.

Everyone has openly shared their grief, anger, suggestions and hopes for the future of Penn State. I’ve listened and I’ve learned.

2) Penn Staters care. I’ve been profoundly moved by the Penn Staters who have pulled together to offer support for the victims and each other. From the moving candlelight vigil to charitable efforts to awareness building programs for this very serious issue, Penn Staters have demonstrated a deep commitment to caring.

3) People are Penn State’s greatest resource. Rob Pangborn has stepped up to serve as acting executive vice president and provost, and David Joyner as acting athletic director. I’m grateful for and confident in their leadership as they help guide us through the challenges ahead.

4) This morning the Penn State Board of Trustees announced the membership of a Special Committee, led by Kenneth Frazier as chair and Ronald Tomalis as vice chair.

They also named Judge Louis Freeh, former director of the FBI, as special counsel in charge of conducting an independent investigation into all aspects of the University’s actions in regard to the recent allegations of child abuse.

As I stated in my Five Promises, my administration will provide whatever resources, access and information are needed to support the investigation.

(Read about Freeh’s appointment at and about the Five Promises at xxxxxxxxxx.

5) Our work has just begun. It will be some time before we are able to bring a measure of understanding and resolution to the recent terrible events, even as we refocus our energies on our students, research and service activities.


When we return from Thanksgiving break, we’ll need to dedicate ourselves to bringing closure to this semester and celebrating the accomplishments of the Fall 2011 graduating class.

Thank you for your support. It gives me confidence that Penn State is moving in the right direction.

I hope you are able to spend some time with your families at Thanksgiving.


Travel safely.


Now, this, in my humble opinion, is what is really being said behind closed doors:


(This is not a football vocational school. It’s an institute for higher learning.)

{Yeah, but when was the last time 80,000 people showed up to watch a kid do a damn chemistry experiment? Why don’t you stick the bow-tie up your ass?}


Dialogue between Dan Hannafin and James Caan in “The Program.”


To be continued…


Always outnumbered; never outgunned…

Copyright c 2011 Michael – Louis Ingram