Straight No Chaser: Saving Private Jim

By Desi Cortez, BASN Columnist
Updated: January 26, 2010

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Jim Thorpe (circa 2005)

Jim Thorpe (circa 2005)

DENVER (BASN) — Is it a stretch to believe, now that Tiger Woods has been bitch-slapped by the world court of public opinion – he’s no longer an honorary White man,

His contrived self-designation as Cablasian or whatever the hell the made-up race is he invented is irrelevant, Woods might now, be better able to relate to, empathize and even sympathize with other Black people not related to his tax write-off charities/PR devices.

Maybe now Tiger will grasp the simplicity of his situation — he’s a Black person — his human flaws will be both maximized and scrutinized beyond belief. The lynch mob which has massed under the ol’ oak tree, will never cease in their effort to demean, humiliate and prosecute him . . .

He wronged a White woman, after the court of public opinion gave him the nod to dirty her. The consumers said it was OK, we’ll still buy your shirts, tee-shirts and shoes.

And if Tiger is today a little more able to relate-to the plight of fellow Black folks who’ve had the weight of the White world fall upon their shoulders, he might feel a little sympathetic to the plight of Jim Thorpe, one of the handful of Black golfers who did all the heavy lifting, all the dirty work, dug the well . . .

so that Tiger could extract millions and millions of dollars from Golf courses around the world.

Thorpe is being jailed, at age 60 for tax evasion, just over a couple of mill in the hole . . . and the IRS want’s his last days on earth as payment.

Can’t Tiger just pull that chump-change out of his pocket?

Granted, Thorpe may well be guilty of this White-collar crime, but nonetheless, Tiger could write a check, pull it out of his personal account .

Just because he doesn’t want to see a trail-blazing Afro-American golfer like Thorpe be imprisoned, branded, defamed, humbled if not humiliated and perhaps broken – for not paying the taxes corporations and aristocrats legally skirt everyday . . .

Let’s not forget, and let’s hope Tiger has some inclination this is what this nation’s establishment does to Black men – it breaks them . .

. for sport, entertainment . . . fun.

It’s an historically documented fact. See Joe Louis and Jesse Owens. Joe helped sell War Bonds, lent his name n’ fame to Uncle Sam, and the bastards went after him, took all his money . . . just for kicks, just because they could.

It would require but a token gesture by Tiger, OK, maybe a couple of million tokens, to assist a Black man, who was a token on a golf circuit which was as unwelcoming as a 1961 Mississippi Klan meeting, but yet ,men like Thorpe and Lee Elder forced the door open . . . so that Tiger could make his way inside the country club and make off with . . . millions.

Granted each and everyone of Tiger’s wounds – are of the self-inflicted variety, no one can possibly have any sympathy for this cat.

Nonetheless, I don’t relish watching a man kicked and stomped when he’s down, and there’s no debate, like O.J. Vick, or Bonds . . .

Several people, sports fans and the press are prospering-off Tiger’s misfortunes, and the issue of race – was at the forefront from the moment the bimbos began turning up . . . and not one looked anything like the women on his mother’s side of the family or his dads.

And that’s my concern, based on Tiger’s exclusion of women of color he was. . .

satisfying, there seems to be no real argument Wood’s has disconnected from other people-of-color.

I don’t know if the early morning wake-your-ass-up call he received a few months back will ring long and loud enough that Tiger sees Mr. Thorpe and offers him a rope.

Tiger could clear Thorpe’s IRS tab . . . just based on “principles” and comradely, because it’s the right thing to do. This would infuriate already inflammed White guys all across America.

For that reason alone Tiger should send a message of respect and solidarity. Instantly, if you had your eyes open and your ears on – you could detect Tiger’s sexual desires were adding insult to this marital mortal wound.

Yes, the uncomfortable, yet indisputable fact; Tiger, being Black, and bedding a vast variety of snow bunnies, attractive women who 25 years ago would not have dared risk the ire of the Anglo Saxon fraternity by being seen with a Black man . . .

His undercover bedroom antics were infuriating White men, his womanizing was in the eyes of a nation where over half of married folks play-around behind each others back, half of all marriages end in divorce . . . were, all of a sudden irate that Woods was insulting the inetgrity of a Nordic Princess.

Tiger will never regain his honorary White man’s card, he’ll never get back his official White man’s decoder ring or special prophylactics, I hope he understands that.

No matter what, he’s in the same boat as Thorpe.

Considering Tiger’s riches, and noting his sleeping with White women has inflamed a number of White IRS agents who hated him because he forever tainted the snow princess . . . merely by marrying her to begin with, these good ole boys are incensed because he “disrespected” a wife he was never really worthy of.

If Thorpe owes Uncle Sam $2 mill, Tiger may end up owing $22 mill when it’s all said and done.

They’re coming after him.