Welcome to the Endzone: Good Hair

By Eric D. Graham, BASN Staff Reporter
Updated: December 15, 2009
NORTH CAROLINA (BASN) — When Chris Rock’s daughter, Lola, came up to him crying and asked, “Daddy, how come I don’t have good hair?”

The bewildered comic committed himself to search the ends of the earth and the depths of black culture to find out who had put that question into his little girl’s head!

Director Jeff Stilson’s camera followed the funnyman, and the result is “Good Hair”, a wonderfully insightful and entertaining, yet remarkably serious, documentary about African American hair culture.

With that said, today in the “Endzone”, we take a comical yet insightful look at hair from an athletic perspective and how hair has had an impact on the game of sports.

1. Hard-hitting Pittsburgh Steeler Troy Polamalu displays his Samoan heritage by not cutting his long wavy hair and letting it hang outside of his helmet. His hair is “beautiful and long” it earned him a lucrative commercial contract with Head and Shoulders shampoo.
2. Newly acquired Boston Celtics Rasheed Wallace with his uncombed hair is happy to be nappy and is living proof that Jesus Christ was a Black man, who had hair like lambs wool.
3. New York Knick Hall of Famer Walt Frazier was simply too cool with his semi-afro with the long pork chop sideburns in the 1970 . “Pimpin ain’t easy…but winning a championship is easier.”
4. Philadelphia 76er Allen Iverson brought the classic cornrows and Afraid braids to the NBA. (Ghetto fabulous never looked so good.)
5. Another Sixer, Julius Erving (aka Dr. J) had an aero-dynamic Afro which was the baddest hairdo in the league whether it was the ABA and the NBA. He looked like God with a basketball.
6. Seattle Seahawk T.J. Houshmandzadeh whose mother is African-American and his father Iranian has that silky, smooth black hair that drives the ladies crazy. He must have some Indian in his family.
7. Utah Jazz Karl “The Mailman” Malone rocked a S Curl until he went completely bald after joining the Los Angeles in 2003. Malone looked so good with his S Curl, Rodney King rocked the same do in his famous press conference (“Can we all look like Malone) I mean, “Can…we all just get along?”
8. Hall of Famer Eric Dickerson, who still holds the NFL regular season record of 2,105 rushing yards used to rock a Jerri Curl along with former L.A. Laker A.C. Green, who rocked a JC for almost his entire career in the NBA. (No, he was a virgin for 40 years)
9. Not to be outdone by A.C. Green and his activator, Philadelphia Phillies pitcher Pedro Martinez also rocked his Jerri Curl even in the 2009 World Series against the New York Yankees. (Just follow the drip..to the championship.)
10. Ex-NBA bad boy Dennis Rodman shocked the world with his rainbow-bright hairdo with the Chicago Bulls from 1995-98 before he went completely blonde and completely crazy.
11. Last year’s defensive player of the year, Pittsburgh’s James Harrison rocks the smooth bald head. Unfortunately, only Black men can get away with this look because if a white guy tries it, we subconscious think about chemo and Nazis. It’s bad joke, I know.
12. Former New York Knick 6-foot-7, 250-pound Anthony Mason had designs and carving in his hair while playing for the Knicks from 1991-96. It looked scary. Or maybe, we were just scared of Mason. Yeah, that’s it.
13. In 2006, Cincinnati Bengals Chad Ocho Cinco tried to get some extra attention by rocking a blonde Mohawk. He got some more attention but the Bengals still didn’t win.
14. Despite Ocho Cinco’s ill-advised attempt to wear a Mohawk, San Diego’s electrifying LB Shawn Merriman made Mohawk look awesome even Mr. T would have been proud.
14. With about a third of the NFL players are sporting African locks, Tennessee Titans Chris Johnson’s locks are dreadful.
15. UFC Fighter Kimbo Slice is nice with the hands and rocks a BIG, BLACK, BAD-ASS BEARD. That bread is so bad and black, he makes Kimbo look like an Old Testament prophet.