Straight No Chaser: All Is Forgiven??

By Desi Cortez, BASN Columnist
Updated: October 27, 2009
“God bless the man, the White man – who’s got his own . . .”

DENVER (BASN) — It must be . . . a blessing to have a chorus of journalistic jock sniffing male-cheerleaders, adrift in deep, dreamy bro-mance, willing to stretch the truth . . . until it’s a lie – all for you, Mark McGwire.

I don’t even think Mac is asking for preferential treatment, I think he is counting on it, because he understands there’s a human slice of the American Pie, which is rooting for his comeback, looking beyond the fact he injected Superman’s sperm into his system, because he’s a good guy, he’s one of them in a world of sports which increasingly look’s less and less like them.

Mac’s a Great White Hope, who was caught shootin’ up some super-duper dope, but unlike Sosa and Bonds, he won’t be branded a cheater for life; The question’ Why not?

How can bygones be so long gone as to folks in St. Louie can say . . .

all is forgotten?

Tracy Ringolsby , noted FOX Sports wordsmith, ( surprise, surprise, surprise) is the first to show his admiration, respect, man-luv for Mac – he’s already laying the ground work of how Mac went into self-imposed exile, of course shamed, not simply cold-busted, and that Big-Mac had to be dragged, kickin’ n’ screaming’ back into the Cardinal dugout, this process constituting an example of his . . . remorse and shame, a telling snap-shot of his good character.

Tracy’s undying puppy luv for Mac — and what Mac symbolizes — goes this far; “McGwire deserves the opportunity. He doesn’t deserve the constant snide remarks and innuendos.” And this dozy- “If McGwire has not been proven to have violated any laws or rules, he shouldn’t be denied the chance to be a part of the game . . . “

Are these two brothers or lovers?

I thought this pumped-up pretend player of the era . . . cheated? Stupid-ass me, I thought Mac didn’t play by the rules, and that was what this was all about. The whole “role model” thing recall? Integrity, honor, telling the truth.

What about all the little White boys in St. Louis who want to grow up to . . . cheat, win, by any means required, like Mac did? But I guess if all can be forgiven and dad’s across the land can advise there’s kids to grow up to be like . . . George W., a dry-alcoholic, one time coke addicted, draft-dodging, Ivy league male cheerleader turned President. . . then being like Mac is a step up.

I guess the MLB commissioner won’t have to peer deep into Mac’s soul to determine if he’s honestly remorseful – it’s not required, we all should just have a warm cozy “gut-feeling” about Mac – he’s a decent, guy who merely made a mistake . . . got caught in a ” little White lie,” stonewalled a Congressional inquiry . . . . no Psycho probing of his mind, no cutting his heart out to see if he really loves Abner Doubleday after betraying him and his game.

I guess this type of rational permits people, mostly angry white guys, to elevate a B-movie actor like Ronnie “666” Ray-Gun to “icon” status, regardless of the fact he not only lied to the American people about I ran-Contra-Crack-Compton-Gate, interjected crack into neighborhoods where it would go on to devastate the population . . . attacked organized labor, supported Apartheid, deemed Dr King a communist and began the massive transfer of wealth – the Trickle Down Theory/Vood-Doo Economics, where we’ve all seen workers wages remain at 1981 levels, while the top 3% of the nation has grown obese.

Nonetheless, dirt poor White folks, who’ve been sold down the river by their wealthy White brethren – the investor class, all the good breadwinner jobs in factories and plants, the ones racist unions fought to exclude Blacks from, have long been shipped off to the four corners of the globe, the Soc’s have told the poor White Trash Greasers, the working class Fred and Wilma’s of America . . . to eat cake, marble cake.

I love the Flintstones.

In spite of this obvious betrayal of the American middle class, the “heartland’ of this country still get’s an erection if you mention Reagan’s name. Trust me, I know.

When the Great Pretender died, Quest Aristocrat ….. had given one of his son-in-laws a radio station to play with, I had a weekend show, told the burning bush truth about Reagan, or at least amplified the feelings of well over half the nation, and within a few hours, the station was “apologizing” for my disrespect, and within a couple of weeks – station was silenced . . . . Reagan, like Favre, like McGwire . . . is a Great White Hope.

What baffles my ass is how this nation of sports-fans can pile-on, consciously contribute to the castration of men like Barry Bonds and Mike Vick, and yet advocate for Mac?

There appears to be a network of writers and talker who minimize, rationalize and regrettably justify the actions of anyone – if they happen to be a Great White Hope. That special someone who embodies ‘the best” of what white guys used to be . . . competitive if not dominant.

This is unquestionably the identical type of hypocrisy and duplicity rampant across American society.

If McNabb win’s a Super Bowl, plays seven more years, and is . . . let’s say more then just competitive, but like Favre he puts up some great numbers occasionally in the endless twi-light of his gridiron career, I guarantee you Donovan can’t play this confused prom-queen bit Bret’s been displaying annually.

Not without being verbally brutalized by the press.

Mike Tomlin could not get away with talking the trash Rex Ryan has in the Big Apple with the Jets.

But then again, we’ve always known this nation has one set of not just standards and laws for people of color, but we’ve known those dual rules rudely reflected their biases and prejudices.

There’s a endless river of empathic and sympathetic tears for White guys who . . . get caught.

Ponder this one, a droid like Dick Cheney can betray a CIA agent and still be the official face of Angry White Men in America.