Straight No Chaser: A Tiger Trap

By Desi Cortez, BASN Columnist
Updated: August 12, 2009

DENVER (BASN) — Tiger had better be careful, really careful, golden net to break his fall or not. Granted he’s nobly defending his conquered foe, and it’s about a “timing rule” not invoked since 1982 . . . being evoked at last week’s WGC-Bridgestone Invitational shootout.

I detect, sports writers are pairing his name with the word “angry” and that’s just not good for business. Tiger is, after all – a business if nothing else. Actually, I’d say he is a industry unto himself. He represents an industry – golf, to be blunt, he is the face of golf, he is golf.

Tiger, Like Democratic Presidential candidate Obama, being Black men, well understand any Black man trying to appeal to mainstream White America . . . is walking a tightrope, and cannot, must not ever be mad, unless he’s mad at another Black man who’s considered “bad”.

For instance Tiger could rip A.I. a whole new asshole, and the conservative established sports press will love it. Now go after a White judge doing his job, for the first time in a quarter century . . . .

Let Tiger say a negative word about Supreme Court jester Uncle Clarence Thomas. Tiger will fill the wrath of Angry White men.

There would be financial consequences and repercussions for his “uppityness.” Talking out of place. Offering a opinion on “sumthin’ no-boty axe you nuthin’ bout boy. ” Translation, Republicans would be taken a-back.

Tragically, Tiger does seem to know better then ruffle Red-necked Roosters feathers, they buy everything tiger fuels his gravy-yachts and palatial planes on.

Tiger can’t get mad nor be mad, it’s not becoming the character that he has meticulously created. Tiger is unflappable, you like to believe he is a Quarterback in disguise, because he appears to embody all those critical elements required to be victorious.

But Tiger can’t “explode” – not just because – it seems to be out of his half-Vulcan nature, but because his corporate sponsors and Yuppie fans might not approve or agree. He may offend someone.

Colin Powell, even as a decorated military officer, understood he was not suppose to ever come across as “angry.” Calm and cool is the unspoken rule for Blacks with a certain tile, alphabet soups attached to their names.

Super Bowl Champion Mike Tomlin, Head Coach for the Steelers understands this. Guys like Tomlin, Dungy and Singletary understood they had to endorse Mike Vick . . . in a certain manner and tone, otherwise raise the ire of White America.

How interesting, Joe Louis and Jackie Robinson had to abide by this rule also, and it wasn’t an unspoken command, it was made clear to them by White America.

They could not carry themselves like Jack Johnson, it was unacceptable to White men. Not too much has changed since , what the mid 1930’s till right here n’ now? Floyd Patterson and O.J. (pre-decaupulation) was White America’s cookie cut good colored boy cutouts.

Hold on, let me get Mr. Chalk board.

Ali and Frazier embody this debate. AI and Tiger are today’s polar opposites. Which boy, er’ man do you want your Idaho born and raised daughter to bring home after her second semester at the Big University?

Hell, which one do I, as a father of a mancub now all grown up want him to grow up to be like?

Here, sit down , let us pull-no-punches; White people still prefer their Negroes humble, unpretentious, unassuming, self-deprecating quiet, docile . . timid even to a point. Tiger and Obama get that.

There’s been much talk about how Obama had to “come across a certain way” to not intimidate or raise the eyebrows of White folks. He could never show anger.

He couldn’t raise his eyebrow to his fellow contenders charges or innuendoes, no matter how erroneous or insulting. Otherwise . . . he would tip off White America that’s he’s really no different then most other blacks; child like emotionally and thug like highly combustible.

My open question to white males . . . why?

Here’s my confusion, since the 1600’s White men have worked to define the Black man’s masculinity, limit his power and vigor, by in essence demasculinizing him; that’s no secret, right? I’d just like an explanation for such appalling, f-upped behavior?

Of course, I am to assume this desire to keep black men down, derives it-self from a feeling of White superiority. These guys just want to keep the lesser humans – in their proper place. Not let the inferior spices mix n’ mingle and contaminate the whole pure organic nordic salad dish

For whatever the reason . . . I just don’t buy it.

It does not matter how many times I check out Elvis . . . he ain’t no Jackie Wilson, James Brown or Little Richard. George Washington Carver was no fool.

Nor was Dr. King, Black men have demonstrated since we got shoved off the kidnapper’s ships – we had the smarts to compete with all the other newcomers to the “New World,” despite being denied human status, equal anything.

Honestly, Donny Osmond versus the late great King of Pop? The Isley brothers twistin’ n Shouting’ or the Beatles? The Quarry Brothers against Ali . . .what was behind such madness?

Up me understand a culture which wants to impose these fake standards of excellence upon the people? Hell, Ringo, John and the boys, Mitch and the Stones – they told Americans living here in quasi-apartheid – they were just emulating the best, but American Bandstand watchers, at least their parents couldn’t buy it . . . hence Pat Boone.

Whoa, I mixed my eras, I doubt too many of you will detect it.

No, I’ve concluded, based on common sense if nothing else – the angry paranoid white man does not repeat, does not feel superior to the average Black man . . . he feels inferior in many aspects.

On top of that, he dosen’t like a women on top of him – too much control and power is given up. He does not seem to want to walk with anybody, walk along side of him, he wants everyone to follow.

Yes, inferiority, rooted not in actually be inferior, because I don’t think the white race is, but inferior based on knowing the status you enjoy in this society . . . was not earned – it was taken, by any means required. That fact in itself, makes it hard to sleep at night for any man of any color.

But that inferiority starts in the bedroom. Then, moving on-to the filed of physical competition, and, in the back of his mind, the Euro-American male understands he has done just about everything outside of what he did to the gallant Red man . . . what Hitler did to the Jews . . . to keep us in our place . . . and yet, we rise.

So, like a boxer, after hitting below-the-belt, poking in the eye, holding behind the neck . . . is trying to keep a lead, or better yet, a abusive punk-ass guy who beats his wife – Johnny O’Brian this self anointed Alpha-Male . . . is afraid to turn his back, go to sleep in his own house, 1776 American Ave.

Perhaps that be poetic justice; you build an empire, in significant part with deceit, lies, mass murders, enslavement, class and gender warfare . . . . I guess it’s a form of “every dog has his day.” White men understand, deep down inside . . . they are due their “come-uppens”

The chickens may come home to roost . . . anyday.

That lead’s directly to paranoia, the White man is hyper sensitive to any detection of Black anger

The fear is Obama, may be, when he takes off his Ivy League Negro attar . . . a Black Panther. Like his female mate, a Nat Turner in-drag. That’s why they are arming themselves, they are afraid Black and Brown people are going to eat them.

Only Mike Tyson eats people, and he seems to like dark meat.

Tiger, like Jordan, like Jetter cannot show what Peyton Manning can . . . anger. Obama can’t behave like Big Pappa George H. Bush or little Dick Cheney and threaten to “whup-a-little-ass.”

Obama could never say, “bring it on” like the draft-dodging male cheerleader did and white folks not be “alarmed ” by his actions.

Kobe couldn’t get away with what Big Ben is about to in the Steele city.

Peyton is the NFL. Peyton can get mad, be angry, it’s acceptable to mainstream America. He’s justified and honorable in his outrage.

Now, on the darker hand side . . . McNabb/ would be “out of control.” V. Young, certifiable, off to the Ha’Ha’ Hotel with him. . . .

Am I wrong? A nation of leather wearing hunters regards Vick – a barbarian.

I don’t believe Tiger Woods thinks I am. Obama’s own campaign openly voiced my perspective. A black man has to openly appease, pacify, but yet woo the White person’s sub-conscience, placate psychotic semi- frenzied white folks . . . the ones who’ve supposedly haven’t already made up their minds they hate you because you’re Black.

Just to wrap it up; I believe the Black race fits nicely into the “Dark Horse” scenario. In the story of America, Obama is that Horatio Alger, Rags to Riches story, the ultimate underdog because he is visibly, visibly a descendant of folks once regarded as property.

His mother , still ’till today, 2009, she is deemed a “pinko-commie- nigger loving . . . .” in conservative homes across America, no?

And they do shoot horses in America . . . don’t they?