Imitation And Life (Volume IV)

By Michael-Louis Ingram
Updated: January 2, 2009

PHILADELPHIA– In our “Is it real or is it, Memorex” world, movies sometimes offer reflections of our current state of culture. Our premise in this series is in revealing the truth as it is seen from between the opening and closing credits…

Christmas Goosed

The New York Yankees, making no bones about their path to world conquest (MLB style) have spent over $400 million in salaries for pitchers CC Sabathia, A.J. Burnett and first baseman Mark Teixeira.

This expenditure of Evil Empire credits kinda kills the argument about the Yanks being so broke that they went begging hat in hand to the city for another $300 million for tax exempt bonds for the new stadium; you know — the one with the $2,500 top seats.

Now some — like Moi — might see this as the last straw in a billion – dollar Bogard by the Bronx Burglars…while others see this as New York City not doing right by its hard – working, tax – paying citizens…

“In collusion? Let me tell you something! I am here at 8:20 sharp every morning and I work my ass off until quitting time. Yesterday, I counted $240,000 by hand for you! That’s how you should know! I mean, come on! This is just not right! I nearly got blown away in your tight-ass fucking bank and you’re going to fire me? You couldn’t even wait!”

– Vivica A. Fox in “Set It Off”

Doin’ A Little Extra…

To attempt to describe the career of Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb in one word leaves me with several to choose from, but only one that suitably encapsulates his career to this point – epiphany.

Before McDaddy does his thing in the wild card game versus the Minnesota Vikings, McNabb walks in the door as the Iggles’ all – time leader in touchdown passes (194) and over 29,000 yards passing in 10 seasons, an 85.9 passer rating which is even more impressive considering the quality of receivers (Terrell Owens and Brian Westbrook excepted) he has had to work with.

Oh, and I’ll also throw in his 26 rushing TDs for good measure.

As I’m watching Philly whip dat Dallas ass all over Lincoln Field, Cowboy quarterback Tony Romo is shootin’ blanks; this is the guy who was hyped to be in the upper echelon of passers, armed with a team that sent 13 Cowboys to last year’s Pro Bowl…

And I’m thinkin’ if D – MC is leading the Cowboys, Dallas would be winning the game. Moreover, if Romo is under center for the Eagles, he’s not making it outta South Philly in one piece!

For anyone who has minimized McNabb’s ability, I ask this question: What quarterback, other than Peyton Manning – could’ve squeezed nine wins and a playoff spot from a team with one of the lousiest and most underachieving receiving corps in the league?

My answer is none – zero.

To quote ex – Houston Oiler coach Bum Phillips, Donovan McNabb, the quarterback who got booed on Draft Day and constantly harangued by little – minded fans and bloviating short – dick men with Escalade mouths, is so good that “not only can he take his’n and beat your’n, he can take your’n and beat his’n.”

No matter what happens this Saturday, McNabb, in my humble opinion, is a Hall of Fame quarterback. When Jeffrey Lurie and Andy Reid tried to turn him out like Trix -Anne Two Bits in the midseason pull for Kevin Kolb, the only reason McNabb got his job back was because Kolb bitched up in prime time.

So Daddy Mc gets his game on and “does that little extra” to get it done at money time, makes the playoffs, and these assholes are on air chirping about how the benching “was good for Donovan’s career.”

I was proud when McNabb said, point blank – “No it wasn’t.”

I can only imagine what he must’ve been thinking when Lurie came downstairs to put his arm around him as the waning seconds ticked off.

Other than, “Kiss my Black ass!” I’m wondering if Donovan has any Motown music on his iPod? (Smiling faces…sometimes…pretend to be yo’ friend…)

“Before you can do things for people, you must be the kind of man who can get things done. But to get things done, you must love the doing, not the people! Your own work, not any possible object of your charity. I’ll be glad if men who need it find a better method of living in the house I built, but that’s not the motive of my work, nor my reason, nor my reward! My reward, my purpose, my life, is the work itself – my work done my way! Nothing else matters to me!”

– Gary Cooper in “The Fountainhead.”

American Pimp

As the post season bowls turn the television dollars churn. According to Football –, every member of College Football’s Five Families (Big 10, Pac – 10, Big 12, SEC, ACC) along with the Big East stand to reap the following for their respective conferences: $20 million for the Big 10, $20.95 million from the Big East, $22.88 million from the Pac – 10, $27.20 million for the ACC, $28.950 million for the Big 12 – and $42.7 million for the SEC.

And every one of the student – athletes who put the asses in the seats go from ballers to bawlers because they don’t get one damn dime of dat chedda.

Talk about Welfare Cheese!

And as NCAA president Myles Brand, a/k/a Pimp Flava Supreme, steps to the podium at the BCS Conference, a hush befalls the crowd as his chalice is refilled with Cristal…

“Now, here’s the sum total: One gang could run this city! One gang — nothing would move without us allowing it to happen. We could tax the crime syndicates, the police, because WE got the streets, suckers! Can you dig it?

The problem in the past has been the man turning us against one another.

We have been unable to see the truth, because we have fighting for ten square feet of ground; our turf, our little piece of turf. That’s crap, brothers! The turf is ours by right, because it’s our turn. All we have to do is keep up the general truce. We take over one borough at a time. Secure our territory; secure our turf — because it’s all our turf!

Can you dig it?”

– Roger Hill in “The Warriors”.

Is It Black Enough For Ya?

Last week, Jack Johnson was the heavyweight champion and Baddest Man on the Planet – 100 years ago.

But ESPN will wait until Black History Month to remind you, because it serves their interests.

Barry Bonds, bat in hand – is the Baddest Man in the Batter’s Box.

But Major League Baseball and their media lackeys reminded you daily as to why he didn’t deserve to continue his career by deliberately aiding and abetting collusion against him extending his personal records.

Because 2008 was the Year of the Apology, and Johnson was pardoned for being an uppity Nigger by Congress.

And 2008 was also the Year of the Reminder – that Black men need to know their place; or we will remind you.

So Barry Bonds, Terrell Owens, Pat White, Joey Porter – watch your mouths – Niggers will be indulged to maintain the status quo – but the Black men have got to go — if they don’t know their place.

Congress, apparently, in a beneficent mood (political posturing and prostitution notwithstanding) also apologized to Black people for slavery.

But somewhere in the recesses of the Negro covenant lurks a blithering idiot, the Rev. Jesse Peterson, who tells the world at large that he is thankful for slavery, likening the crossing of millions of Black people in the holds of ships to being in coach class of a crowded flight (Is that shackled or non – shackled seating, Reverend?)

Doesn’t matter — apparently you know your place.

But I digress – let’s get Black to the apology. Since July 29 of last year, not one muthafucka in the mainstream media (and very few other news gathering groups, save us and C- Span) has written or uttered one sentence about this monumental event.

152 days later, every liberal, conservative and otherwise news outlet, news agency, newspaper, news station avoided the apology for slavery like the Plague, fearful that the subject of reparations would stir up all the good Nigras into talk of Revolution…

And CNN bitched – up like the hypocrites they were in casually ignoring this event a couple days after they revealed to the world what it’s like to be Black in America!

When change officially comes, and my President puts his hand on the Bible like all my other Presidents before him, will the thoughts be of building a basketball court in the White House complex, or of courting a complex plan to undermine the change to come?

“The real problem is this, James…in 2 decades there will be 7 billion human beings on this planet; most of them brown, yellow or black. All of them hungry, all of them determined to love…they’ll swarm out of their breeding grounds into Europe and North America – hence Viet Nam.

An all out effort there will give us control of south Asia for decades to come; and with proper planning, we can reduce the population to 550 million by the end of the century.

I know – I’ve seen the data.

We sound rather like Gods reading the Doomsday Book, don’t we? Well, someone has to do it…

Not only will the nations affected be better off, but the techniques developed there can be used to reduce our own excess population—Blacks, Puerto Ricans, Mexican – Americans, poverty – prone whites and so forth…

– Robert Ryan and Burt Lancaster in “Executive Action”.

To be continued…