A Very American Coup By Michael – Louis Ingram, Editor-in-Chief...
The ï¿½Donï¿½t You Know Who I Amï¿½ Line Just Isnï¿½t Working These Days
SAN ANTONIO ï¿½ So Iï¿½m sitting around the other day and this commercial comes on the television the other day and itï¿½s none other than Gilbert Arenas and his teammate, Awvee Storey. They were doing this credit card commercial.
ï¿½Hi, do you know us?ï¿½ the commercial began.
ï¿½Weï¿½re professional athletes but you wouldnï¿½t know it,ï¿½ Storey chimes. ï¿½Even when the Sand patrol in Miami-Dade County strong armed us, we werenï¿½t recognized.ï¿½ ï¿½I even made the statement of, ï¿½You canï¿½t arrest me. Iï¿½m a basketball player for the Washington Wizards, it didnï¿½t help,ï¿½ Arenas says. (Video of him getting taken down and saying that exact phrase is played behind them in the commercial) ï¿½But now we carry this, the official pro athleteï¿½s identification card. We never leave home without it.ï¿½ Iï¿½m sure somebody from Mad TV will be calling for that bit and if they do, you know Iï¿½m going to go out in style and sell it like it was my last one. But on a serious note, the fact that Arenas would even use the ï¿½Donï¿½t you know who I amï¿½ card is priceless these days because it continually shows why society should stop trying to treat athletes and celebrities as royalty and more like the common folk.
It also shows that athletes need to quit thinking they are privileged souls. As funny as the bit above is, make no mistake; professional athletes like to use that phrase as much as we use Dawn to wash the dishes in the kitchen.
Think about it for a moment. How many times do you even think an athlete would use the phrase? Heck there are all kinds of scenarios. Hereï¿½s just a few opportunistic times that the phrase could be used somewhere in society: At a posh bistro outside of Times Square, A-Rod is trying to get a table: ï¿½Excuse me but donï¿½t you know who I am? I play for the New York Yankees?ï¿½ The response by the restaurant’s hostess? ï¿½Iï¿½m sorry Iï¿½m a Mets fan and I JUST gave your table to Katie Couric and Walter Cronkrite.ï¿½ Looking at a very expensive jewelry store on Rodeo Drive, Kobe is waiting to buy another pink diamond: ï¿½Excuse me but can you help me? Iï¿½m in a rush.ï¿½ The store manager says, ï¿½Sir, please youï¿½ll have to wait your turn.ï¿½ Kobe replies, ï¿½Donï¿½t you know who I am? I play for the Los Angeles Lakers.ï¿½ The store manager says, ï¿½I donï¿½t care if youï¿½re Kobe Bryant himself, Mr. Jackson and Ms. Buss will be waited on first.ï¿½ Oh and this one will definitely work. Standing in line at the pharmacy in Super Wal-Mart, Barry awaits getting his prescription filled. He grows impatient and starts to murmur, ï¿½Can somebody please help me? I need to know the difference between the two tubes in my hand.ï¿½
The pharmacy tech recognizes him right away and says, ï¿½Surely Mr. Bonds Iï¿½ll help you. You have the wrong cream. Neither one of these two will help you with your bat swing or your arthritic knee.ï¿½ Okay, that was a cheap shot on Bonds but I couldnï¿½t resist. Been a long time since I took a crack shot at him and even though those examples were a little over the top, you can imagine pro athletes and their families trying to get the hook up strictly because of their status in society.
When it comes to preferential treatment, many athletes think it is their duty to not only cut in line but to be treated like kings and queens. Whose fault is it that we have such rudeness? Why itï¿½s the ever-loving society where we want to know their every move. People flat out have a conniption if they donï¿½t get a chance to see one of their favorite sports stars up close and personal.
What is so ironic is that many times this phrase doesnï¿½t pop out until the athlete needs something from somebody and that is usually a favor. Iï¿½m quite sure Arenas was trying to get his way out of showing up in front of the magistrate.
Iï¿½m sure that Gilbert was quite embarrassed and he just wanted to get away from the situation as soon as possible. He wanted out of the limelight. As for his teammate, Iï¿½m sorry who is he again? See, sometimes it works and a lot of times it doesnï¿½t; even in a column.