The Tuna’s Act Is Old With This Cowboys’ Fan

By Gregory Moore
Updated: November 9, 2004

Bill Parcells

SAN ANTONIO, TX – I am now officially disgusted with the Dallas Cowboys of 2004. I am ready to say the season is a complete failure and that it is time for Jerry Jones to start assessing blame for a failed season (Jerry you can start by not picking Stephen Jackson in the first round of this year’s draft). I am so disgusted that I even told a friend of mine that I was ashamed of being a life long Dallas Cowboys fan. Why am I feeling this way? Because of Bill “Tuna” Parcells and his tired act. His coaching style is antiquated and the game has passed him by. So for this Cowboys’ fan I’m already looking for a new head coach because this act is old as Methuselah right now.

I know my thoughts right now are based on emotion but they have to be. Here it is I’m watching the team that I love dearly play against a team that I have a warm spot for. I may not be a fan of the Cincinnati Bengals like I used to be in high school but that franchise brings warm memories to me. It was during my high school years that I attended my first Superbowl and that was because of the Bengals. I was a fan of the “Icky” Shuffle. I was disappointed when the franchise was 0-2 in appearances but that hasn’t left my heart empty. The Bengals’ organization has a warm spot here but that also means that I don’t want them to be beating up on the team that I grew up with the majority of my existence. But that is a different story for another time. Right now I’m highly upset with Parcells and his arse backwards way of coaching right now. This is 2004 and he’s still coaching a football team with intimidation and degradation of players. I’m sorry but maybe that’s just the wrong approach for today’s athletes. Bill ever think that if you start respecting the lower tier guys, they may play for you? A novel concept that just might work.

Keyshawn Johnson

This past Sunday’s game showed every Dallas Cowboys’ fan why this game was so atrocious. Old age people, old age. While I applauded Jones and Parcells for bringing in veterans like Eddie George, Vinny Testaverde and Keyshawn Johnson, I didn’t expect for them to bank the team’s future on these individuals. All three of them along with a few other guys are so far over the hill it’s ridiculous. It’s now apparent that Jones hasn’t prepared his club for the future. I say because I look at what my favorite basketball team has done. The San Antonio Spurs have locked up their core players for the future and all of them are way under 30 years old. Look at the Cowboys’ veterans and you can see that they are all approaching the 35 and up club. Heck I’m 38 years old and it pains me to watch old farts trying to get first downs on fourth and inches or can’t even pick up two yards is ridiculous. That’s the kind of stuff that just sends me looking for a new team. When you don’t draft another secondary player this year, it befuddles me and so many other fans.

So when will Parcells realize that he needs to do something different? How hard is it to get second and third string players to play for you when you ridicule them? After all they are only executing the game plan that you are calling. Maybe your play calling sucks royally. There is no vertical threat in the offense. There is no running game that makes defenses play your wide receivers. And who’s fault does this ultimately fall on? Hey Charlie, err Billy, err Tuna, it’s your fault. You’re the head coach and ultimately the fans are going to blame you for this debacle of a season.

I don’t think I’m being unreasonable here. The Cowboys should be on the other side of that score from this past Sunday. 26-3 should have been the Bengals looking exactly like they truly are. Parcell’s team should have run roughshod over that team and they didn’t. They played like a bunch of sissy boys who have never stood in front of the men’s restroom sign before. That’s just flat inexcusable in my opinion. It’s inexcusable for a bunch of players who say they know how to win games and want to play for a coach who is a proven winner. Well right now I don’t see any of that and it’s disturbing. If it were any other team I’d be ragging on them. Well I’m not going to play favorites. This is the team I root for and I’ve been fed up with Parcell’s actions for a while now.

Jerry it is time for you and Billy the Tuna to realize that there needs to be a new way of doing things. Parcells shouldn’t be allowed to resign either. He ushered this mess in so he might as well be the head janitor and clean it up. Just do us Cowboys’ fans a favor Tuna and start winning some games. Most of us realized that this team wouldn’t be 10-6 but doggone it, if we wanted a 5-10 season again, then we would have kept Dave Campo. Stop floundering around when asked about playing Drew Henson. You do the right thing and the media will stop asking. Just do the right thing and coach this team the way they should be coached. And if you don’t remember how, call up Brian Billick or somebody like that. Maybe they can also show you how to treat those ‘other players’.